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Monday, September 27, 2010


하지마, pronounced ha-jee-ma, is one of my favorite Korean words!  It's the english equivalent of "Don't do that!" 

 Sometimes I've yelled "hajeema" because my students have done something that shocked, scared, or angered me at the time, but when re-telling the story to friends, over dinner or drinks on a later date, the stories seem to bring belly laughs to all around!  This blog is dedicated to some of the stories that I've heard that have given me nice long belly laughs!   

So, thanks, in advance to Gill, Aaron, Truchen, and Jenna for being the brunt of these stories and for sharing them with me so I could share them with the whole world wide web!

This is Gill... and her story takes place in an elevator!
Gill was on an elevator one day and an ajuma (older korean woman) got on with her.  That day, Gill was wearing a low cut shirt, which you will NEVER, in a million years, see a Korean girl wearing!  (They never show cleavage!)  Gill was standing, staring at the ceiling of the elevator, when all of a sudden, the ajuma reached up and squeezed her right boob!  Shocked, Gill turned in surprise and gave her a dirty look!  The ajuma then disapprovingly grunted at her and walked off the elevator!  Gill thought, What, was I suppossed to do?!  Let you just freely squeeze both of my boobs and then say Thank you and bow as you left?

This is Aaron... and his story takes place in the boys bathroom at his school!
A little background for ya: There's a 4th grade girl at Aaron's school who's, lets just say, freakishly special!  So special in fact, that she has her own personal teacher who follows her around to make sure she doesn't kill anyone.  (I'm not exaggerating!)  There are no special school's in Korea for mentally unstable children, or those who are a danger to society, because Koreans chose to ignore mental health issues!  So, unfortunately this VERY scary young girl is amongst hundreds of other children and teachers who are all terrified of her! Aaron compares her to the freaky girl in The Ring, and I would agree!  I saw her one time!  

So, here's the story!  Aaron was using the urinal in the boys bathroom at his school one day, and had just zipped his pants, when he heard a loud slam in the bathroom stall next to him.  Shocked, he turned to see what was happening, and all of a sudden the bathroom stall door swung open and that crazy girl came out with her pants pulled down to her ankles and her shirt pulled up to her chin, grunting and jumping around!  Needless to say, Aaron went running down the hallway like a schoolgirl!  

This is Truchen... and her story takes place in her kindergarden class!
Truchen was sitting with her darling little kindergardeners, reading a story, when all of a sudden she felt something on her leg.  She moved the book out of the way, and looked down to see what it was.  One of her kindergarden girls was actually humping her leg! 

This is Jenna... and her story takes place during recess!
There's a thing in Korea we call "Dong Cheem!"  It's nothing you ever want to experience, and luckily it's almost always the boys who do it to the male teachers!  It's basically where students put their pointer fingers together, come up behind you, and shove it where the sun don't shine!!!  Yes, I'm serious!

Jenna was talking to one of her students during recess, when all of a sudden one of her female students (elementary age) came up behing her and, as she recalls: "popped me right up the butt with the infamous poop needle!"  She was shocked, as she should be!  So, she took the girl to the side and told her not to do that to teachers!  Obviously it didn't stick, because a week or so later she struck (literally) once again!  Long lived the "dong cheem!"

Last, but NOT LEAST!  I'm going to leave this person anonymous!  Sorry for all you inquisitive peeps out there, but you're just gonna have to deal with it!
This story also takes place in a kindergarden class!  At the end of my friend's class, his students always run over to hug him goodbye!  This time, though, one of the little boys ran over to hug him and went head first into his penis and bit it!  Needless to say, that kid got a big push out of the way and a well deserved "hajeema!"


  1. OH MY WORD I was dying. That is hilarious. :)

    Also, please tell Truchen to give me her cute dog. I love it.

  2. Hahaha. These are too funny. You can't make this stuff up!